The Misfit Musher

Don't worry, folks, I know you have been anxiously awaiting, but the time is here. The time of the year that you have been waiting for since the same time last year, casting you into a perpetual cycle of euphoria-anticipatory depression-eurporia-anxious despair, has finally arrived. You made it through pumpkin spice latte cult time. You are nearly through the ever popular American holiday Halowegiving. 

Here at the kennel, I have been making a name for myself as the Misfit Musher, that is the looney toon who puts harnesses on the dogs who have never wanted to work ever and then gets on a bike and lets them run wild. It is a blast. So in honor of my misfits, Nicky and Halona, I have brought some other misfits to make this announcement and bring you back into the manic stage of your annual obsession:

Say hello.

Are you ready now?

The Misfit Toys and I are proud to announce that the whole world can now enter into:

CHRISTMAS TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  PPLLBHHBTHKJSAKDNLKWDSLFDNAWLBEEXCITEDFDMJKNFSKJNFAD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(side note: where the heck is Yukon Cornelius in this photo??? Jerks, clearly being musherist again! Well, we will see how that creepy little dentist feels about drilling his root canals on Santa and Rudolph with no novacaine because only the dog team could possibly weather the raging snow storm, but NOOOO they weren't important enough for the picture.)


What did you say?

It is only November 10th? 

What else?

We haven't even had Thanksgiving yet? 

oh. 

You see, I am a little confused do to the fact that I up this morning to this

It was snowing. 

It is still snowing.

I grew up in a desert. 

Where the people who sang songs about there being snow for Christmas are all a pack of liars. 

So now that there is actually snow, literally falling from the sky (who knew!!??), my little sun-dried raisin brain is having a real hard time wrapping itself (because it is so withered) around the fact that it is NOT Christmas.

How is it not Christmas when I walked outside to feed the dogs this morning and was able to make them personal snowmen??

Whom they all loved...eating!

And believe me (I will save you the whole rant) but I am not someone who is a grand supporter of consumer America and its schemes to make me start buying crap for Christmas in May, so this has nothing to do with the commercials already on TV about going out

 QUICK! 

NOW!

 BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!

 BEFORE THE TURKEY HAS COOLED FROM THANKSGIVING!

BEFORE THE MACE PEOPLE COME TO THE LINES AT WALMART!

                               to go shopping for Christmas presents. 

Also, few things say Christmas more than snow except for:

PUPPIES!

And then you get double-whammied with

PUPPIES IN SNOW!

So you see why I am feeling a little holiday-non-conforming right now. It is probably even worth it to add that Canada already had Thanksgiving, so my Christmas Clock has actually been screwy since October. 

I guess I get it now though, Consumer America, that is. Walmart...JC Penney's...Target...Macy's....Best Buy...they aren't evil with their schemes to obliterate the real meaning of Christmas and replace it with a desire TO BUY EVERYTHING. No, they aren't evil, they're all just Canadian dog mushers!

For the honor and glory.